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Funny Question & Answers (Jokes) December 25, 2008

Posted by bloggerrkumar in Funny Q & A (Jokes).
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Little Susie came running into the house after school one day, Shouting,

“Daddy!  Daddy!  I got a 100 in school today!”
“That’s great, Sweetheart,” said her daddy.
“Come in to the living room and tell me about it.”
“Well,”  began the confession, “I got 50 in spelling, 30 in math’s and 20 in science.”

 

Waiter    : I’ve stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog’s leg.
Customer  : Don’t tell me your problems. Give the menu card.

 

Man  : How old is your father?
Boy  : As old as me.
Man  : How can that be?
Boy  : He became a father only when I was born.

 

1st thief : Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief : But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief : Hurry! This is no time for superstitions.

 

Customer  :  Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter    : Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.


Customer: Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter: Swad se nahin pehchan sakte kya.?
Customer: No, I can’t.
Waiter: To is se kyaa fark padta hai?

 
Amit to Waiter: There’s a fly in my soup.
Waiter: That’s all right sir, he won’t drink much.

 
Rahul to Waiter: There’s a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter: So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?

Anuj to Waiter: What’s the meaning of this fly in my tea up?
Waiter: I wouldn’t know sir, I’m a waiter, not a fortune teller.

 
Rehan: Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter: Funny?  But then why aren’t you laughing?

 

Lady: Kyaa ye train meri hai?
Station Master: Nahin ye to railway ki sampatti hai..!!
Lady: Bakwas mat karo.. kya main ise delhi tak ke liye pakad sakti hoon
Station Master: Nahin madam… mujhe dar hai kyoonki ye bahut badi aur bhari hai..!!

 
Teacher: Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter: Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and
The game went into extra time.

 
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?
Wife: Yes and no.

 
Customer: agar main is letter ko aaj raat post karoon to kyaa ye do din mein delhi pahuch jayega
Post Master: Haan Bilkul
Customer:Main shart laga sakta hoon… ye nahin pahuch payega..
Post Master: kyoon…?
Customer: Ismein address mumbai ka hai.  🙂

 Ramesh: Doctor Saab mujhe bhoolne ki bimari hai:
Doctor: Aisa kitne dinon se hai.?
Ramesh: Kyaa kitne dinon se hai..?
 

Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear.
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No, mine is undying love.

 

Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their  MISTAKE.
Answer  : On their MARRIAGE.

 

What do u call a woman in heaven?
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven?
A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven?
PEACE ON EARTH!

 

What did Tarzan think when he saw a dead Cheetah?

Wow! New Underwear

 

Question: Difference Between GOD, TAILOR, GIRL FRIEND & WIFE?

Answer:     GOD MAKES MAN,
                 TAILOR MAKES HIM GENTELMAN,
                 GIRLFRIEND MAKES HIM HE-MAN
                  AND WIFE MAKES HIM DOBARMAN.

 

Question: What is the Difference between Mother & Wife?
Answer: One Woman Brings U into this world crying…
& the other ensures U Continue to do so.

 

Question: What is the difference between women and puppies?
Answer: Puppies grow up.

 
Why do women always have a stupid look on their faces?
Answer: Because they are…

 
What do women have in common with ceramic tiles?
Answer: Fix them properly once and you can walk all over them forever.

 

If you drop a women and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit the ground first?
Answer: Who cares ?????..

 

 
What’s the difference between an intelligent woman & a UFO ?
Answer: I don’t know, I’ve never seen either.

 
What are two reasons why women don’t mind their own business?
Answers: 1) no mind 2) no business

 

What did God say after he created woman?
Answer: I can do better than this! And then he created man

 

If you drop a women and a brick out of a plane, which one would hit the ground first?
Answer: Who cares ?????..

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